the post without a title

This morning I woke up at 6:00am, after only 5 1/2 hours of sleep. I fear I will be tired today, but I couldn't go back to sleep....even though my eyes were still visibly tired. Annoying right?? Especially when you consider I am in my last trimester of pregnancy......rapidly growing a baby.....and that makes me.....tired!!

Anyways, the point of this post?? Well, my thoughts may be all over this afternoon. Please be patient and bear with me.

If I haven't expressed it enough here, or in person, via messages/emails or on the phone with you.....I am breaking. I am not the only one. My children, who are pretty strong kids, are having a very hard time. The walls are quickly closing. We are so incredibly cramped. We are so incredibly hurting. We are not in a very good spot. This is not because we don't laugh, or have fun. It is not because we are not depending on God. This is not because we don't love or because we aren't choosing to be joyful, this is because our reality is pretty dang tough. Real tough. Most days, we see the silver lining. But some times, some moments, some days....are hard.

I woke up this morning, researching.....because that is what I do best!! I found some great articles, on some great websites, about the new face of homelessness, that being homeless families. I read some statistics, that didn't give me hope....the effects of homelessness on children {although I know my kids and I know my God and I am refuting those statistics ;).} My mind couldn't focus. My brain couldn't focus. Here's the thing, unless their is a miracle....and I am not saying that could not happen, I am just saying we will not be able to take care of our family for a while without a miracle. A long while. I am afraid most people think "Praise God! He got a job!" And they move on. The reality is, folks, our income wouldn't cover rent for a 3 bedroom house. We do Praise God for this job. We are so very grateful!! And we are thrilled for the husband to be able to move up in a great company. He is looking into what department he would like to go to, after his first year, and after he gets the classes and pre req's out of the way. He will move up, Lord willing. But, in the mean time, *we* {us humans, husband&wife,mom&dad} cannot take care of our family.

So what do we do?

Honestly, we don't know.

We keep going. We keep living. We keep moving. We keep dreaming. We keep praying. We keep hoping. We keep relying on Jesus. We keep praising.

But here's the most painful thing.....we keep being told to be strong. As if we aren't. We are told to have faith. As if we don't. We are told to do this or do that. By people that may have good intentions, but have not been here and don't really, truly understand. And then they go about their day.

I have lived my entire life having a heart for the needy, not doing much, except praying for those in need. Which is a good place to start. But I have to ask you and myself, would Jesus just pray and then walk away? I don't think so. Galatians 6:2 calls us to carry each others burdens and through doing so we will obey the Law of Christ. So I ask you this, Are we really being His hands and His feet? I mean really? Or are we just worried about getting our summer wardrobe squared away. Buying a new car? Buying the latest gadget? Are we really caring for those in need? Are we really carrying each others burdens the way Christ intended for us to? When we sing this song, do we really mean it? We have people in our churches who are homeless {us,us,us!!} We have people in our churches who are hungry. We have people sitting in the pew right next to us who are suffering loss or who are going through a nasty divorce. We have single parents that need, desperately need a support system. We have kids in the church being horribly abused. We have women in the church who are scared for their lives. We have men in the church who were beat down their entire childhood, being told they'd never be anything, and now their not.....and we judge them. And that is just the church, friends. That isn't even getting out of your comfort zone and reaching the lost out in the world, who are experiencing the very things I just listed and more. 

I am not saying this in judgement towards YOU or to ME. I am asking you, what does God really want you to do? I think I know the answer to that for me. Only you can answer that for you. 

Here is the other thing.....I have to wonder if just giving our money to charities and walking away is enough. I have to honestly ask that! Why? Because I have gone to places for help, because I have made the calls, because I have gotten the {extensive} run around, and because I have been told there are millions of people in my situation. I am not sure giving our money, as a tax right off, to a charity is the answer. Especially if we just turn our cheek. I do not really know what the answer is. I just know that this is a problem. I would've never known the extent, if I have not had to live it. Interestingly enough, there used to be a homeless lady that 'lived' at the park by our old house. I drove by her often. I prayed for her often. We prayed for her. I tried to express to my children how this could be us, this could be anyone. It is not just drug addicted, alcoholic, lazy people who are homeless. I desired to instill compassion in them. We prayed for her as a family. We brought extra food with us in the car, so that when we passed her, we could give it to her. She was never there when we had food for her. I am sure she still lives there. I don't know her story. I may never know her exact story, but I know mine. It is probably pretty similar.

So for now I am asking you to seek your heart. What could you do?

In posts to follow, I may include some statistics. I may give references to articles. I also ask you to share this blog. Share this post. If I am going to do what I think God is leading us to do, which is help individual families, individual people.....then we have to get the word out. I cannot do this without your help! Share. Facebook. Tweet {Twitter has suspended my account. Again. I am hoping to have that fixed soon!!} Email. And if you know someone {trustworthy} who can help me with the look of this blog...email me! There is work to be done, my friends.

There is work to be done.